So, I got laid...off
"Hey, man, how come you haven't posted a blog entry lately?" Fair question. Honestly, I've been busy, getting laid...off, that is. That's right, folks. I've been laid off from my job. I am (temporarily) a member of the "unemployed."
SIGH. So, has anyone ever experienced that? It's quite a trip.
I got a phone call from my boss at 9 AM. (Why do they do this first thing in the morning? Kills your whole day. And in my case, it happened on a Thursday, so it kind of kills your whole weekend, too.) Seems to me if they were smart, they'd do this at the END of the day; get one more solid day's work out of you. What the heck, they have to pay you for that day anyway, right?
I had an interesting meeting with my boss and the HR director. Here's a rough idea of what happened. My 'hidden' comments, which I didn't say out loud, are in red.
My boss: (on phone) Glenn, can you take a walk down to my office?
Glenn: (on phone) Sure thing.
Glenn's mind: Oh, I hope this isn't about using e-mail for the wrong reason.
(minutes later, I arrive at his office, and I see my boss and the HR director sitting there.)
Glenn's mind: Oh, man. Mr. HR. Wait a minute...I saw my boss talking to you a few days ago. Aw, crap. I'm done.
My boss: Well, Glenn, we've decided to outsource all of our documentation needs. Your position, and the remaining positions on the team have been eliminated.
(Glenn blinks, three or four times)
HR man: I'm sorry to say, but this will be your last day with us.
Glenn's mind: My last day? Don't tell me you expect me to go back up to my desk and do a day's work. (pause) Oh, you're booting my ass out in a few minutes. I see how it is.
(Mr. HR shoves a whole bunch of paperwork under my nose)
HR man: Ok, this statement tells you how your benefits will....
(I honestly don't remember all the stuff that the paperwork was for. You're not really listening at that point.)
HR man: ...so, are there any questions?
Glenn's mind: Just one. At every company meeting for the last five years, all I've heard is how awesome we're doing and how much money we're making. You guys are really good liars if we're obviously now too broke to keep a 3-man documentation team.
Glenn: Yeah. Can I go say good-bye to some people?
HR man: We'd prefer you didn't. Not the best thing for morale.
My boss: You can go speak to Barry, and he'll tell everyone else.
Glenn's mind: Sure. After five years, why should it matter if you say good-bye or not? Now THAT'S good for morale.
Glenn: Fine. Whatever.
HR man: This is my card. Call me if you need anything. I'm sorry, we don't like this any more than you do.
Glenn: I bet you don't. (rises)
(So, my boss "escorts" me back to my desk, to make sure I don't steal any confidential stuff. Like I give a crap about any of our CDs, manuals or software at this point. As we're heading up to my desk, my boss passes another guy...)
My boss: (to other guy) Hey, we need to meet to go over that immediate issue.
Glenn's mind: Hey, I'll help with that. Oh, no, wait, I can't. You're getting rid of me.
(We arrive at my desk. There's all this paperwork laid out on my desk. Ironically, this was the stuff I was going to show my boss to have him review. Can review it all he wants now.)
Glenn: (taking a CD from my computer) Just gotta get this.
My boss: What is that?
Glenn: A CD of Christmas music. I'm listening to it to choose music for a Christmas concert.
(My boss blinks, three or four times)
Glenn: Um, it's mine.
(I walk over to Barry.)
Glenn: Hey, Barry, I've been laid off.
Barry: What? Man, that sucks.
Glenn: Yeah, it does. Could you please let everyone know.
Barry: I will. Good luck.
Glenn: Thanks, you too. It's been a pleasure.
(And so my boss "escorts" me to the door. As I get to the door, a woman on the doc team is just entering for the day.)
Fumiyo: Hi, Glenn.
Glenn's mind: Fumiyo, don't go in! They're gonna can you! Go grab as many paper clips and staplers as you can! That'll teach those SOBs!
Glenn: Hi, Fumiyo.
My boss: Ok, good luck. Call me if you need anything.
Glenn: Yeah. Just want to say, this has been one of the best places I've worked.
My boss: (blinks) Ok.
(Door shuts. I stand in the sunlight. Blink a few times. Walk to my car and get in. Whip out my cell phone...)
Glenn: (on phone) Dave? Hey, is it too early for alcohol...?
Sheesh. Hard to believe, isn't it? They tell you not to take it personally, but it's hard not to at first. I've had a working relationship with my boss for almost five years, and all that boiled down to "Ok, we're getting rid of you, don't let the door hit you on the way out."
But I'll tell you the truth. Part of me sees this as a blessing in disguise. I always knew that I would be leaving this company, and I would have preferred to do it on my own terms. But, hey, things don't always work out the way we plan.
So, what happens now? I took a few days off to re-evaluate some things. As for where I go from here, that will be a future blog entry.
Stay tuned. :)
SIGH. So, has anyone ever experienced that? It's quite a trip.
I got a phone call from my boss at 9 AM. (Why do they do this first thing in the morning? Kills your whole day. And in my case, it happened on a Thursday, so it kind of kills your whole weekend, too.) Seems to me if they were smart, they'd do this at the END of the day; get one more solid day's work out of you. What the heck, they have to pay you for that day anyway, right?
I had an interesting meeting with my boss and the HR director. Here's a rough idea of what happened. My 'hidden' comments, which I didn't say out loud, are in red.
My boss: (on phone) Glenn, can you take a walk down to my office?
Glenn: (on phone) Sure thing.
Glenn's mind: Oh, I hope this isn't about using e-mail for the wrong reason.
(minutes later, I arrive at his office, and I see my boss and the HR director sitting there.)
Glenn's mind: Oh, man. Mr. HR. Wait a minute...I saw my boss talking to you a few days ago. Aw, crap. I'm done.
My boss: Well, Glenn, we've decided to outsource all of our documentation needs. Your position, and the remaining positions on the team have been eliminated.
(Glenn blinks, three or four times)
HR man: I'm sorry to say, but this will be your last day with us.
Glenn's mind: My last day? Don't tell me you expect me to go back up to my desk and do a day's work. (pause) Oh, you're booting my ass out in a few minutes. I see how it is.
(Mr. HR shoves a whole bunch of paperwork under my nose)
HR man: Ok, this statement tells you how your benefits will....
(I honestly don't remember all the stuff that the paperwork was for. You're not really listening at that point.)
HR man: ...so, are there any questions?
Glenn's mind: Just one. At every company meeting for the last five years, all I've heard is how awesome we're doing and how much money we're making. You guys are really good liars if we're obviously now too broke to keep a 3-man documentation team.
Glenn: Yeah. Can I go say good-bye to some people?
HR man: We'd prefer you didn't. Not the best thing for morale.
My boss: You can go speak to Barry, and he'll tell everyone else.
Glenn's mind: Sure. After five years, why should it matter if you say good-bye or not? Now THAT'S good for morale.
Glenn: Fine. Whatever.
HR man: This is my card. Call me if you need anything. I'm sorry, we don't like this any more than you do.
Glenn: I bet you don't. (rises)
(So, my boss "escorts" me back to my desk, to make sure I don't steal any confidential stuff. Like I give a crap about any of our CDs, manuals or software at this point. As we're heading up to my desk, my boss passes another guy...)
My boss: (to other guy) Hey, we need to meet to go over that immediate issue.
Glenn's mind: Hey, I'll help with that. Oh, no, wait, I can't. You're getting rid of me.
(We arrive at my desk. There's all this paperwork laid out on my desk. Ironically, this was the stuff I was going to show my boss to have him review. Can review it all he wants now.)
Glenn: (taking a CD from my computer) Just gotta get this.
My boss: What is that?
Glenn: A CD of Christmas music. I'm listening to it to choose music for a Christmas concert.
(My boss blinks, three or four times)
Glenn: Um, it's mine.
(I walk over to Barry.)
Glenn: Hey, Barry, I've been laid off.
Barry: What? Man, that sucks.
Glenn: Yeah, it does. Could you please let everyone know.
Barry: I will. Good luck.
Glenn: Thanks, you too. It's been a pleasure.
(And so my boss "escorts" me to the door. As I get to the door, a woman on the doc team is just entering for the day.)
Fumiyo: Hi, Glenn.
Glenn's mind: Fumiyo, don't go in! They're gonna can you! Go grab as many paper clips and staplers as you can! That'll teach those SOBs!
Glenn: Hi, Fumiyo.
My boss: Ok, good luck. Call me if you need anything.
Glenn: Yeah. Just want to say, this has been one of the best places I've worked.
My boss: (blinks) Ok.
(Door shuts. I stand in the sunlight. Blink a few times. Walk to my car and get in. Whip out my cell phone...)
Glenn: (on phone) Dave? Hey, is it too early for alcohol...?
Sheesh. Hard to believe, isn't it? They tell you not to take it personally, but it's hard not to at first. I've had a working relationship with my boss for almost five years, and all that boiled down to "Ok, we're getting rid of you, don't let the door hit you on the way out."
But I'll tell you the truth. Part of me sees this as a blessing in disguise. I always knew that I would be leaving this company, and I would have preferred to do it on my own terms. But, hey, things don't always work out the way we plan.
So, what happens now? I took a few days off to re-evaluate some things. As for where I go from here, that will be a future blog entry.
Stay tuned. :)
posted by Glenn at 7:29 AM
2 Comments:
Dude, that sucks! I'm sorry!! If I may say, it doesn't look like it has effected you at all - which is GOOD!! DAMN THE MAN!! They don't know what they just booted out the door! GOOD LUCK!
Hey Glenn, sorry to hear about the news. Everything happens for a reason though. Keep the chin up! Good luck and keep us posted (no pun intended).
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